As I am entering my last few weeks of pregnancy I have to write down my thoughts! First can I say I really enjoy being pregnant! I think it's a miracle, it's beautiful and amazing! I don't like to complain very much because HELLO... I did decide to do this. It for sure is not so comfortable at times and makes things more difficult, but it is so amazing. It's funny when your pregnant for the second time how it can be different. Things that I recall being such a big deal the 1st time around, really isn't that big of deal. For example...going to the bathroom ALL the time...during the day, at night...ALL the time and this time it doesn't seem to be as much of an issue at all. Not saying that I don't pee all of the time but just doesn't seem to come up on my radar. That could be because I'm at home where as before I was working and maybe it just stuck out more to me. Another WONDERFUL thing is that I'm still sleeping fairly well. I do wake up to go to the bathroom and at 6:30am I feel ready to get up for the day but I stay in bed because I don't want to wake Max up and I know that in a month I will wish I could be sleeping more. Because this could be our last pregnancy I am really trying to ENJOY the MOMENT even though I'm very, very ANXIOUS to meet Cole I also love carrying him inside and feeling him move...I LOVE IT. I am enjoying my final weeks with just Max and knowing that my attention will not be as much on him in the coming weeks as it is currently...I want to make it count today. People keep asking me "Aren't you ready to get him out" and to be honest with both pregnancy's I didn't and don't feel that way because I know life will be so different on the other side. Plus because I'm not miserable I just don't feel the urge to rush or to get him out at all. I'm very grateful for that and do realize that any day that could all change too as Cole gets more crowded inside. I do get very anxious to see how my labor is going to start and how it will all end up. I didn't enjoy the pain of labor, but the experience was INCREDIBLE! Going through labor and hearing Maxwell's first cry and getting to see him will always be ONE of the TOP highlights and most special moments in my life and I'm thrilled to go through it all again. I'm very EXCITED to see Max be a big brother and how he gets along with Cole...when he is born and through life in general. I think he will be a great big brother!
There are concerns though...I won't lie. I am hoping there are no complications and I continue to pray for a healthy delivery and child. I hope nursing goes well again if not better...you just never know until you are doing it. Losing the weight, though I did it last time...2 kids will make it more of a challenge. I hated how I felt about myself (self image stuff)...the hormones probably didn't help either and so I'm really hoping that this time around it will be better. I am worried I will feel guilty for Max and that he will feel sad, I know that will pass and it's a natural progression but it is still hard for me to think he will feel sad and then on top of that if he acts out more...aghhh...scary to think about. When you have one child they are your only concern and I loved that when Max was born it was all about him. I could sleep when he slept and there really wasn't much to worry about besides him and his needs and two kids...well that changes that whole routine! No sleeping when Cole sleeps because Max will be awake! I know many mothers have done it and continue to do it which is a relief since they seem to make it through the day and survive so I know I can do it, just the unknown is scary. I'm sure it will be like it was with Max, totally unknown and slowly it will become just a normal routine and normal life! Everything new in life takes adjustment and that is what this is.
5 comments:
You look great! I can't believe your are at the end of your pregnancy! I can't wait to see your beautiful little boy!
You are going to do great, I remember being in your shoes and having all of those same worries. I won't say it was always easy, the first few months have some tough times, just getting used to having TWO, but I loved watching Gracie with her little brother. Max will love little Cole so much. He may have moments when he wants your attention, but i think you'll be surprised at how much he loves his little brother. I look at my two now and I feel so blessed, and it's so fun when they can run around and play together.
I'll be keeping you in my prayers for the end of your pregnancy to go smoothly and for an easy labor and delivery. Keep us updated!
You are just so cute, I can tell by your glowing face that you enjoy being pregnant! It is an amazing experience, that's for sure! I remember feeling the same way you are right now when I was about to have my 2nd child... and you know what, it's just not as hard as you'd think. Just like you're saying this pregnancy doesn't to be as "uncomfortable" or things are as big of a deal to you this time around... well the same usually goes once the baby is around too. You will have PLENTY of time with just Max once Cole is here because they literally sleep all the time! And he will love getting to help you take care of him while he is awake! Yes, Max may have his moments, and you'll probably have yours too, but I bet the transition into being a family of 4 is going to go a lot smoother than you think. We will also be praying for you and your family as you prepare for your new baby boy to join your family! I can't wait to hear your birthing story and see pictures of sweet little Cole!
Hey! I lost the weight with my second easier than my first, so dont' worry so much about that, you have to keep uo with Max and that helps! You forget how much newborns sleep during hte day (forget about the night part though !LOL!) But you really will ahve tons of time with Max in the beginning, it gets a bit trickier at 6 months when the baby can "play", but enjoy the frist 6 months while you can! You will love it and I am so excited for you!
I really need to get your email address :-) But as requested, I posted some new belly shots today and a report from my doctor appointment. I'm still not certain if I have a really strong feeling either way, boy or girl. But if I had to pick one, and I were a betting person, I would place my money on boy.
Have you had any contractions yet? You're getting so close!!
You look so great Jill! How exciting you only have a few weeks left! I can't wait to see little Cole. I hope everything goes well with your labor :-)
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